Guns, Religion and Political Correctness

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I’m a White Dude. I’m not a Liberal. Not a Snowflake. Not a Leftist.

Nor am I a Conservative or Neo-Con.

I fall somewhere in the margins. I believe fully that the American Citizen should be legally able to own any and every Fire Arm that is owned by the US Government. That includes everything from a .22 Pistol or Revolver to a Browning M2 .50 Calibre Machine Gun. If the State has it, the Citizen should be allowed to have it. I’d even include Grenade Launchers and 90MM Recoil-less Rifles.

A Private American Citizen should be able to purchase and own Body Armor and Kevlar Helmets. All types. Again, if the State has it, the Citizen should be able to own it if they so choose.

I believe in the right of the Citizen to Self Defense. Against all enemies. Foreign and Domestic. We should be able to defend ourselves against local and State Police, the DEA, the ATF, the FBI, the CIA, al Qaeda, ISIS, Antifa, the Weather Underground, Ted Kazinski, the Council on American Islamic Relations (CAIR), AIPAC and any other organization that seeks to undermine our Rights as Human Beings.

Note: I left out the Black Panthers. I’ve researched the Black Panthers. They were not a Terrorist Organization. They organized themselves to fight against the Terrorism of the Local and State Police as well as J. Edgar Hoover’s FBI. The FBI has been a terrorist organization since they first handed the reigns over to Hoover. J. Edgar was nothing more than an American State Sponsored quasi-secular Osama bin Laden. The Panthers were not Terrorists. They were a reaction to Jim Crow era Terrorism directed against Black Americans.

I do not like Political Correctness. While I do agree that we should be sensitive to the pain that we may cause others, I will not alter everything about myself or my beliefs to satisfy the moronic hypersensitivities of the thousands of Special Interest groups that cling to the Leftist quasi-Marxist cultural authoritarians of the Democrat Party. The Democratic Elite do not care about these groups. They use these groups as wedges and cultural swords against all who dare defy the Power of the Democratic Party Elite.

Dare ye question Hillary or Chelsea Clinton and you shall surely have these sharp edged morons at your person, your career, your life. The Left as it stands now should be destroyed.

I abhor the Right Wing Xties. These people are not followers of Christ. They know nothing of the words or message of the man whom they call Jesus Christ. They know nothing of Constantine and the truth of how Christianity spread throughout the world. They think God worked mysteriously. No. That’s not how it happened. Christianity spread much as Islam did. By the sword. Through brutality, force, rapine and pillage.

The original Church (Cult) of Christ spread through the word. Through letters and gospel. That ended the moment that Constantine lied about seeing a cross in the sky at Milvian Bridge. It ended the second that God “spoke” to Constantine telling him to conquer in his name.

The great lie of  Christianity is that Constantine, the Roman Emperor, saved the religion and raised it to Imperial power. If it weren’t for this event, Christianity would be another backwater religion in the lands of Islam. Christianity was saved by the very Empire who hung their Messiah from a pole at the behest of the Jews.

These are some of my beliefs. No, I’m not an Atheist. I refuse to label my beliefs. There may or may not be a God. If a God there be, he either cares nothing for human events or, if he is directing them, this God or Gods is a monster.

The history of the world is nothing but conquest, thirst for power, thirst for gold and thirst for land. Unquenchable thirst, it is. For the quest for power, gold and land never ends. Not even in this supposed civilized age.

This brings me to Islam. Islam arose in the deserts of Arabia. Muhammad walked to a cave, heard voices and exited the cave with a new message for his people. He attempted to preach that message and was chased from Mekkah with a few followers. He fled to Medina where he picked up followers overtook the power base and took the city for his own. He then returned to Mekkah at the head of an army. He conquered Mekkah.

From that conquest, he built an Empire based on cave ramblings which he called Islam (Isss-LAHM). Submission to Allah was required of every human being on Planet Earth. Muhammad had no idea of the size of the Earth at that time. He spread Islam by the sword. His armies conquered, raped and pillaged all over the Middle East. His soldiers were paid via plunder. They took from those whom they conquered. They took gold, silver, swords, land, women and slaves.

They gave those whom they conquered three choices:

1. Revert [convert] to Islam
2. Pay at tax (Jizya) to remain as they were and live under special rules as second or third class citizens in their own lands.
3. Die

These are not the actions of a Religion of Peace.

Various Islamic Qaliphate conquered the whole of the Middle East, North Africa, parts of Eastern and Central Africa, Spain and Portugal, Eastern Europe, and much of Asia. There was a part of Vietnam conquered by an Islamic Kingdom called the Cham. The Cham didn’t arrive in the area now known as Vietnam and Cambodia and simply invite people in to create a new Kingdom based upon Islam. They conquered!

When they Leftist Cultural Marxists recite the Pledge to Islam and claim that it is a religion of peace, they fail to reconcile Islamic history with their errant claim.

Islam was born in blood. Islam rises now in blood. The bloody history of Islam is a deluge of violence, conquest, rapine, pillage and slavery.

Oh…and there is that Hijab. Supposedly, this is a symbol of chastity and closeness to God. God needs women to put on a veil to be close to them but men can be close to Allah in shorts and tank tops. How stupid are these women?

I often wonder if any of the members of the Democratic and Republicans are capable of critical thought?

When I reflect upon their attitudes towards God [the Gods] and religion, I come to the only possible conclusion.

Democrats and Republicans have been so brainwashed by the Public Education System that none of them are capable of independent thought. The Christian Right has been further dumbed down by Sunday School. The Left has been lobotomized by Political Correctness.

 

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The Liberals Who Cried Racism!

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Racism is the default defense mechanism of the Left.

This is one reason that I did not want a Hillary Clinton Presidency. There would have been zero room for criticism of the Queen of Chaos.

If Hillary had been elected and caused World War III, any criticism leveled at Hillary would have been met with accusations of misogyny. It had already started during the Democratic Primaries. The “Bernie Bros” all hated women according to the Hillary Echo Chamber.

The Left cannot help themselves. They cannot take criticism. They believe themselves to be incapable of mistakes. Any and all criticism must most assuredly come from a place of hate for a persons race, gender or sex.

If the Democrats ran a Muslim for POTUS, he could enact an executive order mandating that all women wear the hijab. Anyone who objected would be branded an Islamophobe.

America Won Because Hillary Lost

 

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I celebrated the end of “marriage inequality.” I love it that my Uncle can marry the man whom he loves and has loved for 40 plus years.

I did not celebrate the fact that “marriage equality” furthered the State’s legitimacy in interfering in the personal lives of Citizens.

There should be no need for marriage equality because the State should have no say in who can or will or cannot or will not enter into a marriage contract.

Why is there such a backlash against Homosexuality in America right now?

Instead of celebrating the above victory, the Left used it to attack folks whose beliefs differed from theirs. Religion, though an idiocy in my opinion, is still strong in America.

Telling a person who owns a bakery or a pizzeria that they must cater a “Gay Wedding” is wrong. A person in America is free to exercise their religion. That is as it should be.

No one has a right to force contract or association. No one has a right to tell me that my beliefs are wrong.

I believe that Christianity and Islam are great evils. I believe that Homosexuality whether it be genetic, learned or choice is no one’s business except the consensual individuals involved in the relationship.

As soon as the Left started attacking individuals and businesses who did not wish to contract or associate with Homosexuals or Homosexuals enterprise, I knew that a backlash would result. Why the Left didn’t see it is beyond me. It’s as if they are stupid.

If one approaches a wedding planner or a bakery and request that they cater a Same Sex Wedding and they tell you that this is against their beliefs, we should accept that answer. We should not force them to cater that wedding or tax or fine them.

Move on to someone who wants your business.

Targeting these people for action in the court did nothing but create this exact backlash.

This is but one example.

Safe Spaces is another example of a phenomenon that has created a backlash. White blaming is another phenomenon that has created ill will across this nation. Pretending that every evil perpetrated across the ages is the fault of White people living today has angered a huge swath of Americans.

You can’t alienate a majority of a population and expect them to love, cherish and respect you.

Yes, I know. That same majority has behaved atrociously over the past 200 plus years. However, the people alive today aren’t responsible for Jim Crow or the mistreatment of Homosexuals in the 60s or 80s. Those people are dying off. Angering the next generations by blaming them for the sins of their fathers is not the correct path.

Forcing contract and association is not the correct path.

Over the past decade, White people in general and straight White males specifically have been told that they are evil. That they are responsible for all of the ills of the world. Most of them aren’t even truly aware of all of the evils in the world. Now, they’re looking around and you’ve made them the enemy. Many might decide to grant you that wish. If you want them as an enemy, they will be your enemy.

I’m one of the most open minded fuckers on the planet. I hate religion. Yet, I have friends of many religions. I’m straight and I have many friends who are not. I don’t believe in marriage but believe that if you want to be married, you should be able to do so. Misguided though it is. I believe abortion is murder. Straight up murder. Yet, I believe that this is not my choice to make and that you are responsible for your actions and your choices. I would not want to be a part of an abortion and would never again talk to a woman who aborted a baby conceived with me. Yet, I would not want abortion to be banned because I know people are weak and ignorant. Banning abortion would only cause needless deaths, suffering and pain.

I support Liberty above all.

Trump is a mistake. Hillary would have been a mistake of equal, if not greater, proportion.

Trump is an unknown right now. I don’t think he will attack social freedoms. I might be incorrect. I thought Obama would be more proactive in protecting or expanding social freedoms. I was wrong. He was lackluster at best in doing so.

Trump will not have the power to remake America in his image. If he doesn’t appoint a special prosecutor to investigate Clinton, Pay for Play and CGI, he will lose much of his support immediately.

Two years from now, he will lose some of the Congressional Majority. It is almost a certainty.

Unfortunately, Democrats were arrogant over these past 8 years. Instead of progress, they chose hubris and vindictiveness. Instead of trying to reach consensus, they preached and told their “enemies” to suck it up because they had won.

I said it four years ago. Beware. The precedents of Presidents always come back to haunt the ordinary American.

Democrats vilified Bush for his wars and worshiped Obama for his wars.

Democrats have been arrogant. They have reaped the whirlwind. They have earned what may come.

Hillary was the most arrogant, self aggrandizing candidate to ever run for the American Presidency. For her, this election was about what she felt she deserved. She enlisted the worst of the Neo-Con warmongers (whom the Democrats once labeled Chickenhawks) and the greediest of the Corporate Banking Institutions (against whom #OccupyWallStreet once railed impotently) and thought to outright purchase the Office of POTUS.

She failed.

In that failure of Hillary Clinton, America won. The World won. Hillary would have been a disaster as President. At the very least, she would have continued and expanded the Bush/Obama wars. At worst, she would have disastrously clashed with Putin and started the world down the road to the conflagration that would, decades later, have been called World War III – the war that ended humanity.

Instead of Hillary, we elected Donald Trump. We know a few things about Trump.

1. He is a business man. No matter how much you hate him, he has been successful. Even if it was snake oil, he successfully sold it. People bought it. He earned Billions from it.

2. He is a former Democrat who ran as a Republican because “they’ll believe anything.”

3. He is, despite the Leftist propaganda, a Social Progressive.

4. He wasn’t called a racist for the first 60 plus years of his life.

5. He only became a racist when the Democrats needed to make him seem so.

6. He makes crazy and, sometimes, stupid claims and statements.

7. He has surrounded himself with insiders whilst running as an outsider.

8. He has very little foreign policy experience. The people that surround him have foreign policy experience.

9. He will still bring to the White House a good deal of fresh perspective. We need that.

10. He is not as evil as the 20,000 people how “protesting” his election (who are on the payroll of George Soros).

We do not know exactly what Trump will be. We can only guess at this time. We can look at his past. The whole of his past rather than the selected soundbytes and photos leveraged against him during the campaign.

Time will tell if Trump is a mistake. Regardless, he’s not going anywhere for four years unless he is assassinated by some Liberal Looney.

No matter what happens over the next four years, it will be better than the wreckage that will have been left in the wake of the Queen of Chaos. America won because Hillary lost.

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Hillary Worship and the War Mongering Democrats

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I know many Democrats who worship this woman. She can do no wrong. It’s all a vast right wing conspiracy.

Much like with Nobel Obama who can do no wrong.

The man who is handed a Nobel for nothing goes on to create “Terror Tuesdays,” Military Age Males strategy, gets nicknamed “the Drone Ranger,” all but invades and causes the downfall of Yemen and it’s government after propping them up, supportsSaudi Arabia and kisses the ass of the House of Saud, has assassinated four US Citizens overseas on his authority alone…zero due process, gave guns to drug lords for purposes that only he and his idiot AG could discern and believe, gave weapons and other equipment to Qaddafi’s enemies even after Qaddafi had all but stepped down from power, has armed several Sunni Islamic groups in and around Syria leading directly to the rise of ISIS and I could go on and on and on.

But none of that is his fault. It’s all the fault of Bush and Cheney.

Democrats hate any war that isn’t their own.

They called Bush a war monger. They call Republicans war mongers.

They maintain steady silence on Obama’s wars and inept strategies and tactics.

American participation in the two World Wars were presided over by Democrats Wilson and FDR. Truman dropped the atomic bombs on Japan, Truman bungled us into Korea and the Cold War. LBJ got us into Vietnam.

But Reagan was a warmonger. lol

Ike ended Korea. Nixon ended Vietnam.

Barack Obama tried to end Iraq but just made it worse and doubled down by arming the worst Islamic militias in the history of the world.

But Democrats want peace. Hillary can be trusted. Sanders just wants to give us “free” stuff.

If it weren’t such a tragedy, it would be funny.

Charity @ GunPoint — The Democrat Way

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Well…ya see.

It’s like this.

I have no problem with helping the poor and the needy.

I’ve given folks spare change. I’ve bought clothing for children in Afghanistan, Cambodia, Thailand and Egypt. Among other places.

I’ve helped rebuild schools, supply schools and have given classes in non-industrial and pre-industial nations.

I’ve worked for charities such as Meals on Wheels in America.

I’ve given tons of stuff to Good Will and the Salvation Army.

I’ve sent money to causes all around the world and in America.

I’ve done all of this and I quite thoroughly enjoy helping others who are poverty stricken or in some way in need of assistance.

WHAT I DON’T WANT and WHAT I DON’T LIKE is giving money to a corrupt, bloated bureaucracy such as the Federal Government of the United States of America so that said bloated, corrupt bureaucracy can waste nearly all of said money by giving it to corrupt, bloated turds of the Republican and Democrat Party Donors Association.

No, I do not think that the United States Government is a good agency for my money or the honest disbursal of said monies to those who are poverty stricken and in need of assistance.

Oh yeah…I’m not Christian. So I don’t really care what kind of person the myth of Christ makes him out to be.

White Privilege and Maoist Self Criticism

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Conscientious practice of self-criticism is still another hallmark distinguishing our Party from all other political parties. As we say, dust will accumulate if a room is not cleaned regularly, our faces will get dirty if they are not washed regularly. Our comrades’ minds and our Party’s work may also collect dust, and also need sweeping and washing. The proverb “Running water is never stale and a door-hinge is never worm-eaten” means that constant motion prevents the inroads of germs and other organisms. To check up regularly on our work and in the process develop a democratic style of work, to fear neither criticism nor self-criticism, and to apply such good popular Chinese maxims as “Say all you know and say it without reserve”, “Blame not the speaker but be warned by his words” and “Correct mistakes if you have committed them and guard against them if you have not” – this is the only effective way to prevent all kinds of political dust and germs from contaminating the minds of our comrades and the body of our Party.

“On Coalition Government” (April 24, 1945), Selected Works, Vol. III, pp. 316-17.

Most of the folks who participated wound up with a bullet to the temple.

I find that “White Privilege” is simply another form of Maoist Self Criticism.

How long until the Democratic Party Leadership begins to murder White People who admit to White Privilege?

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And then there is Che


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Barack Obama seems to think that Che Guevara was a Hero

Random Thoughts on the Destruction of American Liberty

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The DNC and GOP are evil.

Neither are good for the country.

Both are good for their respective Lobbyists and Special Interests.

Both target key demographics and lie to them to get elected.

Unions represent the interests of their respective organizations. Police Unions represent the interests of Police. They lobby for legislation that will benefit the Police. Laws such as COPS and 1033, qualified immunity, confiscation, etc.

The Wars on Poverty, Crime and Drugs were initiated by Democrats. All of these so-called wars benefit the Police, empower the police and destroy the rights of the Citizens.

The War on Terror was initiated by Republican Bush 2. However, Obama has taken that war and run with it. He’s made it his own. The NDAA, NSA spying, police militarization, assassination, rendition, invasions and occupations…all of these things were started by someone other than Obama, the Democrat. Yet, Obama has taken them and injected elephant steroids into these programs and gone about the business of destroying the Constitution.

Any Political Party that centers on the corruption that are American cities is bound to be corrupt.

Police have, historically, been Democratic run organizations. Not Republican.

Military members joining the police forces enmasse is a recent phenomenon. This is happening recently as a result of the terrible economy and programs put in place by respective Clinton, Bush 2 and Obama DOJs.

Our current volunteer military is only 30 years old. Prior to the “All Volunteer” military, our nations military services were made up of careerists who retired after they left service and draftees who were mostly poor. These draftees left the service and went into all career fields and some into none as most were from the poor or lower middle class.

This preposterous idea that the Police forces in the military are made up of mostly ex-military is patently false. I looked it up and it can’t be proven or disproven because no one (not even the DOJ) keeps statistics.

I have been researching American police forces for some time now because of Obama’s continuation of Bush’s War on Liberty. Police come from predominantly working class familes. They enter the police force between the ages of 21 and 24. That does not give the majority of them time to enter the Military, ETS and then join the police as a goodly majority of Police have at least 2 years of college. This is a prerequisite for some, if not most, Police forces.

Police Brutality, of late, is a direct result of the Bush/Obama war on Liberty and the Constitution.

Both the Military and the Police are tools of the State.

Police forces have been given qualified immunity. This means that they are not accountable to the citizenry and not held to the same law as the rest of the citizenry. They are, in fact, above the law. Bush and Obama have brought this about via legislation, “Wars on…,” and court appointments.

This must change or America will no longer be a free nation but, instead, little better than Maoist China.

The Democrats are no better than the Republicans. They are the same. This is an age old tactic. Divide and conquer.

By choosing D or R, you are defeating yourselves and destroying America.

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America’s Greatest Criminals aka Political Parties

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Criticism of one political party is not approval of the other. Neither is approval of one effort, program, legislative act or idea consent to, approval of, validation of, endorsement of nor support for either political party in any way, shape or form. I wish Americans and, especially, Democrats and Republicans could comprehend this.

Any time I say anything about one party, the other comes rushing in to defend or criticize the other.

Often times, the every day person is unaware of his parties history and true actions versus their rhetoric.

I’ll state this again: I THINK BOTH PARTIES ARE CRIMINAL!

No real difference between political parties whether you want to discuss the National Socialist of Germany, the Bolsheviks, Menshevists Russian, Christian Democratic Party of Germany, Socialist Party of America, the KKK, The Black Panthers, Hamas, Fatah, Likud, Kadima, Jamiat-e Islamic, the the GOP or the DNC.

Each and every one of them will do anything to win and to stay in power.

Each has lied to start wars and each has caused the murder of hundreds of thousands to millions AND each are supported by Corporations and assorted other terroristic, criminal organizations.

If it is a corporate backed political party it has been corrupted by profit and greed driven CEOs and Bankers. It is not worth human effort and definitely not worthy of trust.

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America Beware: History and Political Parties

America Beware: History and Political Parties

If you believe that Democrats are Good or that Republicans are Evil, I’d suggest a look at history.

Both parties have tried to be the party of humanity. Both parties have failed. Both parties claim to be for the rights of humanity. Both parties continuously and consistently fail to work for the betterment of humanity. Both parties lie to the American public first and above all.

If someone attempts to tell you that the GOP or the DNC wishes the citizen well, that person is lying.

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Abolish Incumbency

Abolish Incumbency

#Idiot America

Congress is universally hated, disregarded, abhorred, disrespected. Congress has our disdain. They’re earned no respect.

Yet, we send these criminals back term after term.

Are the American people just plain stupid?

We Disapprove…but fuck it! Let’s re-elect the criminals anyway!

The Statist Nightmare called “Progressive” America

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Anyone who stands behind the fascist laws of this nation may be able to read. However, these persons are much too brainwashed to be capable of critical or independent thought.
America is supposed to be a land based on justice, liberty and “pursuit of happiness.”
I know this concept is foreign to most liberals and conservatives who wish to impose their will upon the population at large.

America, thanks in large part to the GOP and DNC, has become an oligarchy wherein justice is known only to the affluent and elitist classes. That anyone besides these persons would support fascism such as that clearly visible in America today is a clear sign of said person’s self-delusion.

I hope that each Democrat and Republican in this country falls victim to the abomination which they have helped create via their blind allegiance to the parties of corruption and greed.

May you all rot in your mythological Christian hell.

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The Statist Nightmare called “Christian” America

Anyone who stands behind the fascist laws of this nation may be able to read. However, these persons are much too brainwashed to be capable of critical or independent thought.
America is supposed to be a land based on justice, liberty and “pursuit of happiness.”
I know this concept is foreign to most liberals and conservatives who wish to impose their will upon the population at large.

America, thanks in large part to the GOP and DNC, has become an oligarchy wherein justice is known only to the affluent and elitist classes. That anyone besides these persons would support fascism such as that clearly visible in America today is a clear sign of said person’s self-delusion.

I hope that each Democrat and Republican in this country falls victim to the abomination which they have helped create via their blind allegiance to the parties of corruption and greed.

May you all rot in your mythological Christian hell.

Climate Change, Wedge Issues and the Uninformed Americans who call themselves Citizens

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Why do people think that this is an American problem. Is it arrogance or ignorance?

“they won’t be able to live the debt ridden lifestyle that America has become dependent on”

The most leveraged nation in the world is China. Sure they’ve purchased a lot of American debt. The problem is that they have purchased all of this with bad money and false accounts.

The whole world is leveraged to the hilt. 

It is not only America that is living off of tomorrow. 

America has an extremely narrow vision when it comes to these things.

America alone cannot solve or even begin to solve global climate change. That’s why it’s called “Global” climate change. Climate affects the whole of the planet.

We can produce all of the carbon offsets that we wish but if the rest of the world ignores the problem, we are pissing in the wind. Beijing is so polluted that folks can’t freakin’ breath.

America, however, is pushing the petro dollar which is why we are so heavily involved in the Middle East.

As long as we are pimping oil to the world via the Gulf, the problems associated with carbon dioxide and polluting the world will only continue to be exacerbated. 

All of this big talk from the democrats is hogwash. The democrats are profiting and gaining as much power from the petro dollar as are the Republicans. 

This is our special problem in AMerica. The citizens of America are dumb enough to believe in Hope and Change charlatans such as Mr. Obama. It’s all a lie.

Until the people wake up to the fact that the Democrats are just as corrupt and just as much a part of the oligarchy and as owned by the banks as the Republicans nothing will change.

However, Democrats are complete buffoons. I have no hope of a democratic awakening. They are much too stupid as a class. Much too bamboozled by Hope, Change and Yes, We Can.

Democrats are much more worried about the next Micronesian Transgender qausi-female lesbian Muslim becoming a Circuit Court Judge to actually be informed about any real issue. Democrats are more interested in Donald Sterling and whether or not he is a racist and whether or not he should be allowed to own and NBA team to actually stop and think that maybe Donald Sterling is a non-issue and who gives a fuck who owns an NBA team. 

The GOP and DNC keep the citizens of the Untied States diverted with these moronic wedge issues. In this way, they stay maintain their powerbase and no one notices that George Soros is the exact same monster as the Koch Brothers.

But, let’s argue over Climate Change…because, well, that’s what they want us to argue about so that they can enrich themselves from both ends of the pipeline.

And the citizens who are registered as Democrats and Republicans will continue to enable the criminals who create the problems that they pretend to resolve.

In short, the American people may be the dumbest people on the planet.

#AbolishIncumbency

Democrats

Well, it’s their turn.  Let’s see how they do.

Take the test.

This test aims to be different. Most tests question your stance on political issues (abortion, gun control, taxes…). This test explains why you think what you think by mapping your personal moral system.

For instance we won’t ask you questions on taxes but try to find what moral views shape your opinion on taxes. Moral views are the major predictors of political opinions.

That one was a Democrat…

A woman married three times walked into a bridal shop one day and told the sales clerk that she was looking for a wedding gown for her fourth wedding.

‘Of course, madam,’ replied the sales clerk, ‘exactly what type and color dress are you looking for?’

The bride to be said: ‘A long frilly white dress with a veil.’

The sales clerk hesitated a bit, then said, ‘Please don’t take this the wrong way, but gowns of that nature are considered more appropriate for brides who are being married the first time – for those who are a bit more innocent, if you know what I mean? Perhaps ivory or sky blue would be nice?’

‘Well,’ replied the customer, a little peeved at the clerk’s directness, ‘I can assure you that a white gown would be quite appropriate. Believe it or not, despite all my marriages, I remain as innocent as a first-time bride. You see, my first husband was so excited about our wedding, he died as we were checking into our hotel. My second husband and I got into such a terrible fight in the limo on our way to our honeymoon that we had that wedding annulled immediately and never spoke to each other again.’

‘What about your third husband?’ asked the sales clerk.

‘That one was a Democrat,’ said the woman, ‘and every night for four years, he just sat on the edge of the bed and told me how good it was going to be, but nothing ever happened.’